a warped gift

:: ::  Mull over this.

But first, you’ll need to suspend judgment on the morality of the act of self-destruction.

A man is catastrophically depressed. He has suffered irreparable damage to his future outlook. He is intent on ending his own life. Despite knowing that his passing will cause great pain to those he leaves behind, he nevertheless wants to be remembered fondly. In this indescribably difficult time, he’s also thinking about others.

Now, consider these points.

:: The last minutes of a person’s life before summoning the strength and will to end it must be extremely sad and horrendous.

:: A common cause of suicide is lack of a purpose or self worth. Living in his own universe, he may reason that the outcome of his suicide is not singularly about the loss of a life – albeit his own. His exit has the potential to save lives – very possibly the lives of children in desperate need of organs. What he leaves behind can help so many people. By ending his own pain – which is also burdensome to loved ones – he can save quite a few people who desperately WANT to live.

The suicide of a loved one must be an almost impossible event to accept. Mucho has been said about the selfishness of this act. But I have to say that, warped as his reasoning and the universe he is living in may be, such a gesture (even with all its built-in ethical and moral dilemmas), has the potential to somehow assist in the healing process for those left behind to know that his death did help save other lives.

Remember, his decision is made and his chosen time of exit is inevitable. Who is to say that people who have reached the point of suicide would not heavily prefer  to save other lives on their way out?

Spread a little life with his death, if you will.

O.K.  Go ahead, bone away. I’m not expecting any cupcakes.

the graces we resist

:: ::  I find this remarkable.

How, the depth of our love and appreciation of a person often only comes to light when death is near. When we are then left with only regrets.

No psyche-shaking wake-up call, not even imminent death seems capable of compelling us to utter words that grant peace. To do for others what we desire done for us, come our time. Truly, we fail to listen, heart-to-heart, to their silent cries.

Cyberspace hosts multitudinous and endless streams of moving words that finally reveal our deep love and appreciation. Beyond doubt and beyond measure, these texts stand as testimony to the painful void in our lives and the sorrow in our hearts that their passing leaves us. Vainly, we attempt to compensate for that one moment of grace.

Their longings and hankerings easily slide to the back of our minds. Like ethereal mist. Quietly but rather quickly. Relegated to a numberless position on our must-do list of our pressing present as well as significant future needs.

What shall I cook for lunch today? How shall I keep my child happy, healthy, safe and smart? Hubby works so hard to feed and clothe us, to give us a comfortable life and secure future. Now, on my part, how can I contribute to the achievement of our mutual goals for a happily ever after? How can I enrich our shared lives?

Such endeavours are unquestionably important and meaningful. They represent our life’s work-in-progress. This is critical to our happy existence on earth. We dedicate and devote our time, resources and endless efforts to ensure the attainment of this noble and desirable goal. Through phases of well deliberated objectives to meticulous development of short and long term plans to strategic implementation of our grand vision and mission. Every waking and sleepless hour of our lives we trim and prune the minutest details. As need arise, we review, we fine-tune, polish and buff every aspect of this project to as close to fail-proof and perfection as we can.

As deep as our grief and sorrow may be, the imminent death of even one so dear is never compelling enough to warrant a momentary moratorium on the deadlines of our ever growing must-do list. Nothing and not a moment can be spared. No, the assertive priorities as well as (relatively) trivial concerns of the living will anytime trump the momentary needs of the dying and dead.